'So, you're a grown woman now, aren't you?'

'Yes. No more teenage tomfoolery. And definitely no more kissing, Artemis Fowl,' Holly chuckled.

'Oh?' The boy genius replied, raising an eyebrow. His smile could almost be classified as cheeky.

'Don't 'oh' me, Arty.'

A chuckle.

'I'm serious. And you better not be thinking about trying to get another smooch,' She warned. And although she didn't know it, Holly's cheeks flushed crimson. It was a light shade, but Artemis noticed it and his eyes narrowed a fraction, catlike. Holly noticed.

'Don't give me that look, mister.'

'What look?' Artemis replied, pulling the innocent act quite effectively. His blue-brown eyes widened and stared at the elf, the perfect image of a naive child.

'The look that says, 'You're gonna eat your words'. Stop dreaming, Mud Boy, because frankly I haven't eaten my words before and I never will.'

'Oh?'

'Stop it with the ohs already!' Holly Short exclaimed,exasperated. 'And quit giving me that big-eyed look. You don't look innocent at all.'

Artemis chuckled softly, and for some reason this small laugh made Holly's hairs stand on end. 'Alright. Fine. After all, I've probably lost my last shred of innocence already,' He said, fingering the neck of his glass pointedly. Holly, apparently, didn't catch the point.

'Yeah,' The now blushing elf replied, feeling cautious.

Artemis looked at her. 'Or maybe I still have a bit of innocence left...' He trailed off, stood up, and started to slowly walk towards the elf, all the while watching her steadily. Holly backed into the wall behind her.

'What the hell are you doing?' She croaked, trying to sound authoritative. She didn't.

'What do you think?' Was the reply. Artemis was stalking Holly. Predator and prey. And as he neared, Holly's eyes darted around - and spotted the culprit.

An empty wine glass stood erect on the wine table. A glass of the finest Japanese Sakae winked accusingly next to it.

'Oh, gods,' Holly murmured. 'Oh, gods,' She said again, words failing her.

Artemis and Holly were nose to nose now.

'Artemis!' Holly said, rediscovering her ability to form sentences. 'You drunk wine! You're not even an adult yet!' Of course, all this banter was to take her mind off the fact that Artemis could very well be drunk now. And God knows what male Mud Men did when inebriated.

'Maybe,' Artemis replied, and was it Holly or did his voice sound slightly slurred? 'Maybe I still have...Have one bit of innocence left,' He smiled dopily. 'Maybe now's a good time to get rid of that innocence, don't you think so, Holly?'

And before she could reply Artemis kissed her on the lips.

One would expect Holly to squirm. But she couldn't, because 1. she was backed up against a wall, 2. Artemis had reached his hand out to lean against that wall to support him, thus blocking Holly's one exit out, and 3. she was too shocked to do anything.

Anyway, Holly spent about five seconds in a dazed stupor. And then she surrendered to the bliss. Because that's what it was.

-------•»♥)

The End...
...of the first chapter.

[Will this remain a stupid oneshot? Will Christie make a second chapter? Will polar bears take over USA? Stay tuned! :D ]